1 John 4:9-10 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. ¹⁰ This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

Yesterday, Katie and I got into a discussion about a little boy at school who “kept bothering,” her. We agreed that the best way to handle the situation is to walk away or find an adult who can help. 

Realizing that this was a teachable moment, I told Katie that she should pray for this little boy, because Jesus told us to pray for our enemies. Katie remained silent, but I could tell she was processing what I’d said. My hope is that a little seed of forgiveness will take root in her heart and teach her how to be a merciful person. 

Forgiveness reminds me of another “f,” word that is offensive. The above verse really touches a nerve on this whole forgiveness issue. Especially the last sentence; ¹⁰ This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

It reminds me of a story from the Bible when Jesus teaches a lesson on forgiveness. 

The gist of it is that a man owes a rich man a great sum of money—a sum he can never repay. So this man goes to the rich man and begs to have his debt forgiven, and because the rich man is a very benevolent person, he agrees to forgive the debt. 

Unfortunately, the man doesn’t offer the same kind of mercy that’s been extended to him. He finds a man who owes him a pittance. And because he’s missed the point of how forgiveness works, he throws the man into jail until he can pay back every penny he owes.  

When the other servants realize what this merciless man has done, they go to their master and tell him everything. In his anger, the rich man throws the man into jail until he can pay back every penny he owes. 

I think about this story a lot when I’m having trouble forgiving. The debt that I owe God for my sins is astronomical. I can never repay it. God knows this and from his benevolent heart he chooses to forgive me. If God can forgive me for every sin I’ve ever committed, who am I to hold on to an unforgiving spirit?

When I’m holding a grudge, I think about this parable and remember that Jesus has paid for each and every sin I've ever committed—even my “little” sins or my reoccurring ones. Every time I ask for forgiveness, God chooses to forgive me. Every time. 

Don’t hold grudges. Don’t hang on to anger. Unforgiveness doesn’t alter the situation—it can’t change what’s in the past. 

Remember that God loved us first, he forgave us first. Then turn around in mercy and do the same for your neighbor. It will help you let go of the past and move on in to the future. And a future free from bitterness sounds pretty good to me.