A Messy Mess

This is just a silly poem I wrote at one point in my life when I felt particularly down about my sinful yuckiness.  Anyway, not much creativity coming out of this brain today, but maybe you'll enjoy this.  I am writing a book about my experiences with mental illness.  Over time I'll be sharing parts of it on my blog.  Just FYI. 

A Mess

Messy, messy, messy, messy.

That’s how I feel right now.

And I wish that I could be

Clean, clean, clean, clean.

But feelings aren’t facts.

God says

that I’m sparkling and shiny.

So why is it,

That I feel like such a mess?

Really, if I was a kid I’d be

Covered in play dough right now.

Or if I was a pig,

I’d be

Up to my snout

in slime.

If I was a raccoon,

I’d be rooting in the garbage.

Or if I was a fish,

I’d be one of the

Scum-sucking bottom dwellers.

Anyway, that’s how I feel.

But feelings aren’t facts.

I’m whiter than snow.

Cleaner than the angels

Shining like gold

 And smelling like a rose.

So why do I feel so messy?

Yucky, dingy, gross,

Want to jump out of

My own skin nasty.

If I was a turtle

I’d be turned upside down.

If I  was a whale,

 I’d be beached.

If I was a unicorn,

I wouldn’t have any horn.

And if I was a duck,

I wouldn’t float.

But God says

I’m fresh as a meadow

after a spring rain.

Cleaner than my

Bar of soap.

Brighter than sunshine

Reflecting off snow.

Yes, I am clean,

cleaner than I’d

ever hoped for.

I’ve been washed in

The blood of the Lamb.