children are a gift

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

 (Psalm 127:3 NLT)

Some days I don’t feel that the above verse applies to my family.  My five- year-old who stubbornly refuses to do his chores, a gift?  Really?  My three-year-old who has mastered the art of throwing a tantrum - she’s my reward?  If I were to count the number of times my children have misbehaved, acted defiantly, ignored my commands – well,  I don’t think there’d be enough books in the world to contain all those stories.  So what’s up with this “children are a gift” thing?   

I remember shortly before I had my first child a baby shower was thrown for me.  One of the “activities” that the guests participated in was to write down words of advice.  Even now I enjoy looking back at these words of wisdom.  One particular bit that has stuck with me through the years came from an aunt of mine.  She wrote, “Remember your child is a gift entrusted to you to train and nurture as only you can do.”  Call me crazy, but I really think that my husband and I were meant to raise our two children in a way that only we can.  God entrusted these babies into our care.  He handpicked us to raise our unique and special little ones. 

What’s more, I believe that about every parent.  Each parent is given the gift and ability to raise their own unique ones.  The problem is that we sometimes forget that.  We forget that they’re entrusted into our care.  We forget how special they are to God, how special they are to us.   Too often in the midst of the muck and mire of life we forget that our children are, indeed ,treasures.

Jesus set a precedent when it came to caring for little ones.  He blessed the children when they came to him.  He soundly rebuked his disciples when they tried to shoo them away.  The kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these, he said. (Matthew 19:14)  So why don’t we act like that - like our children are the best and greatest gifts we have ever been given? 

Even worse, why do some become careless and callous towards these “gifts” – neglecting and even abusing the very ones who were meant to be treasured.   Children are the most vulnerable beings on the planet.  They depend on us.  They look to us to for all of their needs.  We are their parents.  We were, in essence, meant to “die to self” in raising them.

I would like to share a story that broke my heart.  It started out as a prayer request from a friend.  This dear friend called me to say that her brother’s girlfriend was pregnant. Not only that but she had decided to terminate the pregnancy.  I don’t know what the reason was – why this path was chosen, but I can’t help but see a terrible irony here.  You see, my friend and her husband have been unable to have children, and they want so badly to be parents.  So here you have this couple eager to expand their family while their brother’s girlfriend makes the decision to end her baby’s life.  And, yes, I’m going to refer to “it” as a baby.  They are gifts after all, born or unborn. 

There is a law in 36 states that states that if a fetus is killed inside its mother’s womb the perpetrator is charged with double homicide.  Crazy.   And what it all boils down to is a matter of convenience, isn’t it?   We call the child a baby when it’s wanted and a fetus when it’s not. 

I know this is a sensitive subject , one I hesitate to bring up.  But even as I write this I can’t get that verse out of my mind.  Children are a gift, they’re a reward.  What if we believed that in every fiber of our being?  If we did, I’m convinced we would see the unborn and all children differently.   We wouldn’t reject a gift as precious as a child because we know that a gift rejected is a sad thing indeed.